New song...nuff said...
TIN MAN
I don't like to think about getting old and gray
I like things just the way they are today
Mirror, mirror tell me please, will I always have to take the bus?
Up, up and away, leaving me behind to
CRY!
I want to...to blame you
But I know better my dear
I have to blame my heart
It's faulty- can you fix it?
Well, then, just toss it
I don't want it
if it might break again.
Something old and something new doesn't have much to do with you
Or does it?
You inhaled my very soul then you turned to go
Kicking up the dirt into my
EYES!
I want to...to tie you up and slap you
till you get it, my dear
I want to...to punch out random people
people on the street
I want to, I want to...
I want to be a tin man now
No heart and no feelings
I want to be a tin man now
All that metal will protect me from your touch
Your soft touch
By this point I bet you think I'm strange
Those who thought they knew me, like Mr. Strange.
But I'm stranger than him
I'm STRANGE! I'm strange! I'm strange! I'm strange!
I want to be a tin man now.
No heart and no feelings
I want to be a tin man now
All that metal will protect me
I want to be a tin man now
All that metal will protect me from your arms
Your warm arms
I want to be a tin man now
No heart, no feelings
I want to be a tin man now
Your kiss on my cold tin lips
will rust them shut
My cold lips
Will stay shut
Monday, July 20, 2009
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Friday, June 12, 2009
So Tragic!
I'm working on the part in my book where Sapphire is suffering greatly and it's awesome because I relate to that right now! YES!!! PAIN ROCKS!!! It makes my writing so much better when I can really feel the emotions I'm trying to portray. In reality, I'm not suffering as much as Saff, but I am completely frustrated and wonder WHY about a WHOLE bunch of CRAP right now. GRRRRR!! I want to take the source of my frustration, tie it up and slap it in the face repeatedly until I get through to it!
So, I had to make this decision, right? I had to be strong and be true to myself and to God and it ended up being a hell of a lot harder than I would have originally expected. THIS SUCKS!!! I want to bail on my common sense and jump out of this plane of responsibility and say SCREW IT ALL! My theme song currently is the song "Reflection" I wrote, which is on my CD, "No More Staring at the Wall."
Goodbyes are hard enough to say.
I'll try to say them anyway.
Why must you run, leaving things undone?
Tomorrow, I'll be on my way.
Leaving thoughts of yesterday.
Emptiness is what I feel, but it's ok.
But is it really me to button up before I go out?
But is it really me to take a sip without examining?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Why do I look so small?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Is there anything to see at all?
When will I be whole again?
Will I gain control again?
That's just how the story goes.
How it ends I'll never know.
Happiness at last will never come to pass.
But is it really me to lose my grip, let go of everything?
But is it really me to have no faith when faith's required of me?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Why do I look so small?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Is there anything to see?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me PLEASE!
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Why do I look so small?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Why do I look so small?
Mirror, mirror please tell me please,
It there anything to see at all?
Now, let me write about tragedy for a second. I'm all about tragedy. It's so much easier to pull emotions for that than happy love scenes. I guess I'm totally morbid and Goth or something... But there really is so much beauty in tragedy; it's the rawness of it, the grit and grime, the agony, the defeat, the turmoil- love it! AND what is so awesome about tragic suffering is the results: strength, determination, patience, perseverance. It is the catalyst for a person to find themselves and discover destiny.
Do I have a destiny? Of course! Is the situation I'm suffering currently leading me to that destiny? I would have to say...of COURSE it is! I can't wait to find out what this is leading me to and I hope and pray that it will be exactly the thing I want most! Amen? AMEN!
So, I had to make this decision, right? I had to be strong and be true to myself and to God and it ended up being a hell of a lot harder than I would have originally expected. THIS SUCKS!!! I want to bail on my common sense and jump out of this plane of responsibility and say SCREW IT ALL! My theme song currently is the song "Reflection" I wrote, which is on my CD, "No More Staring at the Wall."
Goodbyes are hard enough to say.
I'll try to say them anyway.
Why must you run, leaving things undone?
Tomorrow, I'll be on my way.
Leaving thoughts of yesterday.
Emptiness is what I feel, but it's ok.
But is it really me to button up before I go out?
But is it really me to take a sip without examining?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Why do I look so small?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Is there anything to see at all?
When will I be whole again?
Will I gain control again?
That's just how the story goes.
How it ends I'll never know.
Happiness at last will never come to pass.
But is it really me to lose my grip, let go of everything?
But is it really me to have no faith when faith's required of me?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Why do I look so small?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Is there anything to see?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me PLEASE!
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Why do I look so small?
Mirror, mirror please, tell me please,
Why do I look so small?
Mirror, mirror please tell me please,
It there anything to see at all?
Now, let me write about tragedy for a second. I'm all about tragedy. It's so much easier to pull emotions for that than happy love scenes. I guess I'm totally morbid and Goth or something... But there really is so much beauty in tragedy; it's the rawness of it, the grit and grime, the agony, the defeat, the turmoil- love it! AND what is so awesome about tragic suffering is the results: strength, determination, patience, perseverance. It is the catalyst for a person to find themselves and discover destiny.
Do I have a destiny? Of course! Is the situation I'm suffering currently leading me to that destiny? I would have to say...of COURSE it is! I can't wait to find out what this is leading me to and I hope and pray that it will be exactly the thing I want most! Amen? AMEN!
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
My life is a whirlwind
It's been a loooong time, I know. Bad Malia, not keeping up with your blog!
So let's get down to it:
I got laid off from my sucky job and replaced it with a fun one for less money, but it's 5 minutes from my house, and because it's less hours and not a 8-5, Mon.-Fri. work schedule, I've been able to sleep in, meet lots of cool people, and be an extra in the Untitled Crowley Project that's filming in Portland. I'm surrounding myself with art and creativity and it ROCKS! I have written a little, but as usual, not as much as I should be. Tee, hee.
Now, for reasons that are completely my own and I'm not telling why, I will share some ancient Egyptian poetry:
O my beautiful one,
I wish I were part of your affairs, like a wife.
With your hand in mine
your love would be returned.
I implore my heart:
"If my true love stays away tonight,
I shall be like someone already
in the grave."
Are you not my health and my life?
How joyful is your good health
for the heart that seeks you!
So let's get down to it:
I got laid off from my sucky job and replaced it with a fun one for less money, but it's 5 minutes from my house, and because it's less hours and not a 8-5, Mon.-Fri. work schedule, I've been able to sleep in, meet lots of cool people, and be an extra in the Untitled Crowley Project that's filming in Portland. I'm surrounding myself with art and creativity and it ROCKS! I have written a little, but as usual, not as much as I should be. Tee, hee.
Now, for reasons that are completely my own and I'm not telling why, I will share some ancient Egyptian poetry:
I wish I were part of your affairs, like a wife.
With your hand in mine
your love would be returned.
I implore my heart:
"If my true love stays away tonight,
I shall be like someone already
in the grave."
Are you not my health and my life?
How joyful is your good health
for the heart that seeks you!
Thursday, February 19, 2009
AAAARGGGHH and CRAP!
I really should be going home right now since I have practice with the Greeks at 8pm! Yes, I am practicing with a couple of Greek guys for the performance I'm doing at the one guy's Greek restaurant. It's going to be a lot of fun singing the Greek songs I'm learning, and belly dancing, too, BUT it is distracting me from my writing!...or to be more honest, I'm distracting myself from my writing. ALTHOUGH tonight, I'm forcing myself to write but I've hit a rough patch. I'm trying to set up this wonderful scene but every thing that's coming out is CRAP! And it's not even the cool kind of crap that has whole pieces of corn or peanuts in it. It's just a disgusting load of uninteresting fecal matter! GRRRR!
I've decided I'm going to walk away from the computer and take a breather before my brain explodes.
The moral of this story is, like poo, writing should not be something that one must strain to get out, but something to relax into, allowing it to ease out naturally.
YES! I am a 14 year old boy! HAHA!
I've decided I'm going to walk away from the computer and take a breather before my brain explodes.
The moral of this story is, like poo, writing should not be something that one must strain to get out, but something to relax into, allowing it to ease out naturally.
YES! I am a 14 year old boy! HAHA!
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